Guys…

[Cameron]

If you contact a provider & she says she chooses not to see you, do you expect a full blown reason why? Or, is it enough for her to just say she chooses not to?

[DocHoliday]

I just say thanks and move along. No reason necessary. You have your reason for yourself and that’s all that’s necessary.

[nameisdalton]

Depends on the reason. If they are too unattractive for you, probably best not to say anything. If there is something they can do to improve their profile (“sorry but your references are not recent enough”) and if you think it would be helpful to them it may be a good idea to help a brotha out.

Anytime we face rejection we are naturally curious why and ask how we could have done better, but ultimately it’s up to you.

[Cameron]

Depends on the reason. If they are too unattractive for you, probably best not to say anything. If there is something they can do to improve their profile (“sorry but your references are not recent enough”) and if you think it would be helpful to them it may be a good idea to help a brotha out.

Anytime we face rejection we are naturally curious why and ask how we could have done better, but ultimately it’s up to you.

I would think if a provider says no, that should be enough.. I get what ur saying, tho…

[nameisdalton]

I would think if a provider says no, that should be enough.. I get what ur saying, tho…

I’m not disagreeing with you. I’m not saying you’re obligated to do anything. I’m just saying if the reasons are professional and not personal, and if you feel it may help someone then it might be something to consider, that’s all.

[Panda9184]

i would say its up to the provider to provide that information. Always helpful for a gentlemen to know what it is that made a provider feel like that if its not obvious for self improvement reasons but it is not owed. However, i do believe a provider should make it clear that they will not be seeing each other instead of just ghosting from a conversation.

[someguy12]

i would say its up to the provider to provide that information. Always helpful for a gentlemen to know what it is that made a provider feel like that if its not obvious for self improvement reasons but it is not owed. However, i do believe a provider should make it clear that they will not be seeing each other instead of just ghosting from a conversation.

I just had this happen with a provider last year. Thing was she’s seen me many times. Then when we had a appointment coming up she didn't send her confirmation texts she does the day of the appointment. Long story short she finally told me why after pulling teeth to get it out of her. The reason I wanted to know an answer was because I seen her many times and to suddenly just ghost me was upsetting. Turns out she had a gripe about me she didn’t bother to tell me about and continued to see me without resolving it. I told her if she had a problem with me she could of told me and worked it out.

[jacksparrow]

If a provider said no, the guy should man up, and take it like a man and move along....and stop being a pussy. There is so much pussy out there for rent.....why be obsessed with just one..

[karvia]

I just had this happen with a provider last year. Thing was she’s seen me many times. Then when we had a appointment coming up she didn't send her confirmation texts she does the day of the appointment. Long story short she finally told me why after pulling teeth to get it out of her. The reason I wanted to know an answer was because I seen her many times and to suddenly just ghost me was upsetting. Turns out she had a gripe about me she didn’t bother to tell me about and continued to see me without resolving it. I told her if she had a problem with me she could of told me and worked it out.

I think this case is different. You saw her many times. Not as easy to brush that off. And as they say: you can’t miss what you never had

I’m curious- we’re you able to work it out after all that or was it too far gone?

[karvia]

To piggyback off what someguy12 said and this topic in general, how have you handled an ATF suddenly deciding not to see you anymore (if it’s happened to you)? I know we generally tend to act indifferent about providers but, I mean this is/was your ATF. Even parents have favorites. Whether they admit it to themselves is another story. By the way, this is excluding situations where they retired, moved away, got into a serious relationship etc. So they’re still on the scene, just not seeing you

Provider side commentary is welcomed

[Cameron]

Personally- If it was someone I’d seen before, I’d give a reason. But, if I’ve never met a gent, I’ll politely say: I’m going to pass on you.. That should be enough. I don’t want to provide a half ass session & if I myself can’t get into it, the guy surely won’t get an honest, fulfilling experience. Some guys can’t take no for an answer & take it way to personal. In the hobby, I don’t really take much personal.. But, if a regular decided to not see me, I’d reply with: that’s ok! I hope you find a provider to fulfill all your needs & satisfies you! Take care.. We are all here to enjoy our own kinks & pleasures!

[Pitroom]

I personally don't understand the hang up. If a woman says no great. Maybe the big head will take over and I'll keep these $$$ in my pocket. It's so many options out here. I have more options than money so we keep rocking. Pussy is not food or shelter. I can do without. Yes I'm human and at our core we desire human interaction and sex, but there are no confirmed cases of dudes dying from not getting pussy .

[someguy12]

I think this case is different. You saw her many times. Not as easy to brush that off. And as they say: you can’t miss what you never had

I’m curious- we’re you able to work it out after all that or was it too far gone?

Nope! I thought about trying to resolve it. But the way she was talking felt like she made up her mind on it. I won’t beg, this is just a sex business. I’m not in a relationship with her. but I was upset because I always told her if she had any issues with me to tell me and I will fix it…depending on what it is. But I guess she wanted to avoid a confrontation with guys she stops seeing. which I understand because she’s mentioned that she doesn’t want the drama. But to just ghost me all of a sudden AFTER making an appointment with me pissed me off. Why even make the appointment? I thought she was comfortable with me to tell me anything that bothered her, but I guess I was wrong.

Well, shit like this is why I can’t see myself ever getting married.

[Ben Rhimene]

I tend to agree with Dalton on this issue. If ladies are truly using the hobby as a business endeavor they should disclose the reason for refusal, just like any regular business does with a patron. To do otherwise potentially harms their business because if they cannot specify why they appear to be vague, at best, and irrational and/or whimsical at worst. None of those are appealing as potential providers. If it is a one-off thing it is likely no big deal, but if more frequent that won't be good for your reputation.

I believe most guys here understand the human side and that we all have preferences...just be upfront about them so people know where you stand.

Does it arise to an obligation? No, but it is just good business practice to alert customers and potential customers.

[Allaboutthebbbj]

I've had 2 providers in the past turn me down. Both said it was because comments I made on the boards. I just moved on.